Deserted Island With Elmo, Grover, Cookie Monster, Or Oscar. Which Sesame Street Character Are You Picking?

I love the Internet. Take a break from your political views, bracket challenges, and Netflix binging to answer a question that MATTERS.

“You’re stuck on a deserted island and you can pick one of these Sesame Street friends to come with you. Who are you picking and why?”

This question is the poster boy for “Process of Elimination.” Let’s start with who I’m NOT taking.

There is a zero percent chance I would take Elmo to a deserted island. If I had a baby, Elmo would be my first pick. However, that’s not the case. Elmo is essentially a baby that won’t shut up. What skills does Elmo have? You think Elmo is going to start a fire? Is Elmo going to be able to find fresh water? No chance in hell. While you’re slaving away trying to build a shelter, Elmo is going to be giggling and asking for someone to be his friend and tickle him. If Elmo and I were on a deserted island, there’s a good chance I’m walking into the ocean and never coming back.

Cookie Monster also gets the axe. I respect someone who has a sweet tooth. However, there are no cookies on this island. Now I expect Cookie Monster to have a few sweet treats on him in case of emergency. However, if you think Cookie Monster is going to share his cookies with you, then you’re naive. Plus, I don’t see Cookie Monster rationing his portions. Once Cookie Monster runs out of cookies and has low blood sugar, it’s a wrap. He will be useless.

It comes down to Oscar and Grover. Who am I not taking out of those two?

Goodbye, Oscar. A lot of people on Twitter are saying, “Oscar lives in the trash. He’d be very resourceful.” Although that might be true, Oscar is a grouch. I don’t need pessimism when I’m fighting to stay alive. Every suggestion would be met with backlash and lead to a fight. Plus, Oscar chooses to live in a trash can. How can you trust someone who chooses to live in a trash can? How does that help you on a deserted island? The answer is it doesn’t.

That leaves us with the clear winner, Grover.

Would Grover be annoying? Absolutely, but he’s not as bad as Elmo. He’s a bit anxious as well, which is not ideal on a deserted island. However, Grover stands out above the rest because of his alter ego and secret identity, Super Grover.

I’ll take my chances with half a superhero any day of the week. It’s Grover for the win.

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