How are your Throners today?
Just two days removed from the Season 6 Finale of Game of Thrones and I’m still in awe of what I witnessed this past Sunday night. Right after I watched it, I said it was arguably the greatest episode of GOT ever. I think it’ time to change my statement.
It WAS the greatest episode of GOT ever.
From the first minute to the end credits, I was on the edge of my seat. Scene after scene, my excitement continued to build. I never wanted it to end. It was so damn good. It’s up there with Ozymandias from Breaking Bad as the greatest hour of television I have ever witnessed.
That being said, it’s time to talk about the Gif of the Year from none other than Tommen Baratheon out of all people. The “My Mom just ruined everything I ever loved in my life and now it’s time to bellyflop out the window.”
Amazing. Genius. Flawless execution. This will be the Gif that keeps on giving. So many situations you can apply it to.
*Realizing your team missed the playoffs*
*That moment when you realize you’ve been friendzoned*
*Going back to work after a long weekend*
*Fuck my life*
I can’t stop laughing thinking of the possibilities. This has a chance to be the Michael Jordan crying face in terms of the go to Gif. Thank you Tommen.
After having a huge Throner after some Sunday night GOT, I needed something to keep the momentum going. Enter Dodgeball. Hell yes. What a classic. So many memorable moments. So may quote. You’re their Fonzi, Pete. Ayyyyy
First things first, Ben Stiller is the star of the show. I’m a big Stiller guy. Zoolander, Heavyweights, Meet The Parents, Tropic Thunder. The list goes on and on. The guy is fucking funny in his movies and White Goodman only enhanced his legacy. W-h-i-t……e. White Goodman is the spiritual sequel to Tony Perkins, my all-time favorite Ben Stiller role. People will always choose the final scene as their favorite, but I’m a fan of White’s interactions with Patricia. I break a mental sweat too. Grab a chair!
Line of the movie: My Cousin Ray Ray. BOOP. Dead
Honorable Mention: Patches talking about drinking his urine. No joke, I actually believe that this guy drank his own urine. That would be the least surprising thing I hear all day.
The most important takeaway from Dodgeball is the electric announcing team of Pepper and Cotton. This is how announcing should be. Pun after pun. One guy doing the play-by-play and the color guy providing the puns and one liners. Screw in game analysis. Make me laugh. If I was Fifa, I would do this strategy in a heartbeat. Imagine if a Bill Burr or Seth Rogen type were in the soccer booth? “And the guy is kicking the ball….and yeah he did it again and passed it to the other guy and Cotton needs new shorts!” Give me guys who know how to make audiences laugh. Entertain me.
First things first, I told you so.
So unless you were living under a rock, the big news in the NBA was Derrick Rose to the Knicks. The Bulls traded Derrick Rose, Justin Holiday, and a 2017 second-round pick to the Knicks in exchange for Robin Lopez, Jose Calderon, and Jerian Grant.
Initial reaction: NO MORE CALDERON. Thank the lord he is gone. However, you better believe Calderon will drop 30 against the Knicks this year. Mark it down. Robin Lopez had a decent year, but he is easily replaceable. The toughest one to say goodbye to is Jerian Grant because of his potential and bright upside. Knicks fans who were pissed at this trade because they had to give up Grant should answer this question: Was Grant the future PG of this team? I can answer that with a resounding NO.
I absolutely love this move. It’s Derrick Rose we are talking about! Yes, all of you statisticians will say how he’s missed more games than played in over the past few years. Rose had one of the most inefficient years as PG in the NBA last year. He’s a walking injury. He’s bad news yada yada yada.
This is Derrick Rose we are talking about. A former MVP who is only 27 years old. He averaged close to 18 points last year as opposed to Knicks point guards, who put up a putrid 7.6 points per game. Makes me sick thinking about it. Yes, I understand he’s logged a lot of miles on the knees, but why not take a chance on him? The Knicks have NOTHING to lose in this trade. If he sucks, oh well. He’s in the last year of his deal and will make $21.3 million this year. If he sucks, then we won’t sign him. Big deal. We’ve sucked before, we can suck again!
Phil rolled the dice. I still believe he has a plan. He was right with Porzingis. He’s taking a chance on Rose. We’re going to give a max deal to a center and although I hate him, I hope Phil says fuck it and signs Dwight Howard (No idea why I said this). The Knicks needed a shakeup and that’s what is happening.
I still say it with pride. IN PHIL WE TRUST.
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